Chances are, you’re a giver.
In most of your relationships, you give more than you ask for. You always care a little more, do a little extra, take the detour to pick up a surprise.
As a result, people turn to you. They trust you. They’ll think of you first when something comes to mind.
Generally, this is a good thing. It attracts new people into your life and makes it easy for them to like you.
But being a giver is not without cost. It can get exhausting. At first, people are grateful for your kindness. Then, they build expectations around it. “What do you mean, you don’t have time? You always used to help me.” Well…
What do we do when that happens? And why does it in the first place?
The Best Kind Of Friendship
Analyzing Aristotle’s three kinds of friendship, Zat Rana suggests the third type, which isn’t based on some form of exchange, is the most desirable:
“Rather than utility or pleasure, this kind of relationship is based on a mutual appreciation of the virtues the other person holds dear.”
It makes sense. A business partner may be necessary, a drinking buddy lots of fun, but if nothing beyond the subject matter connects the two of you, the relationship will…
